In What Font, In Whose Spirit, In Whose Blood

Happy Divine Mercy Sunday!

Love the Collect for today!

God of everlasting mercy,
who in the very recurrence of the paschal feast
kindle the faith of the people you have made your own,
increase, we pray, the grace you have bestowed,
that all may grasp and rightly understand
in what font they have been washed,
by whose Spirit they have been reborn,
by whose Blood they have been redeemed.
Through our Lord Jesus Christ, your Son,
who lives and reigns with you in the unity of the Holy Spirit,
one God, for ever and ever.

AMEN!

Comforter of the Afflicted and the Refuge of Sinners

Venerable Fulton Sheen+, The Mystical Body of Christ

Our Lord did not make His earthly life one prolonged transfiguration. In those few, brief moments He did reveal the glory which was really His, but at all other times He appealed through the humanity which was like unto ours. His fatigue at Jacob's well, His tears over Jerusalem, His agony in the garden, His sufferings on the Cross - all the "weakness" of His human nature - have won more souls to Him than the blazing garments and the Heavenly Voice of Thabor.

In like manner, if the life of the Church had been one triumphant, blazing transfiguration on a mountain top, apart from the woes and ills of man, she would never have been the Comforter of the Afflicted and the Refuge of Sinners. She has been called, like her Divine Head, to be a redemptress, lifting men from the shadows of sin to the tabernacles of grace where Saints are made. She is not a far-off, abstract ideal, but a Mother; and though she has been stained with dust in her long journey through the centuries, though some of her children have left her and saddened her soul, yet there is joy in her heart because of the children she has nourished; there is gladness in her eyes because of the faith she has preserved; there is understanding in her soul for she has known the frailty of our flesh, and how to nourish us back to life. And in these qualities one divines the reason why Our Blessed Lord chose, not a sinless man like John, but a weak, frail, fallen man like Peter as His first vicar, in order that, through his weakness, he and the Church of which he is the head might sympathize with the weakness of his brethren, be their Apostle of Mercy and, in the truest sense of the term, the Vicar of the Saviour and Redeemer of the world who came not to save the just, but the sinner.

Called For A Greater Purpose

A life-changing realization:

"There is something wonderfully sacred that happens when a girl chooses to look past being set aside to see God's call for her to be set apart." ~Lysa TerKeurst

This is a grace. The truth is, yes, I have been set aside, many times. All of us have, at one point or another in our lives, been set aside. And it hurts. But the greater Truth is that God, my Father (*my Father!!!) has called me through and beyond that hurt, wholly His beloved daughter, for a greater purpose. What I love about Lysa's words are this: Though I cannot change or control being set aside, I can acknowledge that it has happened and then choose (this is huge!) to look past this fact and see, know, and believe God's call *for* me to be set apart.  He has chosen me, and I belong wholly to Him.  Every moment of my life, past, present, and future has been redeemed by Jesus's life saving sacrifice and resurrection from the grave. All of me and every moment of my life belongs wholly to Jesus, and He has created me completely anew as God's beloved daughter.

Yes, I have been set aside. It hurts. And in that moment, I choose to turn to You, Jesus.  Help me to turn to You in every moment, for You have redeemed all.  I know and trust as I look to You that You have created me completely anew, set apart as a beloved daughter of God, Our Father. I praise You and thank You, Father. For I am wonderfully made and made new by Jesus. In Your Holy and Saving Name Jesus, I pray and I love You. Amen+

"...let your love lead your steps to Jesus wounded, to Jesus crowned with thorns, to Jesus fastened upon the gibbet of the cross."

"Since fervor of devotion is nourished and preserved in us by a frequent return of our thoughts to the passion of Christ, anyone who wishes to keep the flame of ardor alive within himself should frequently--or rather, incessantly--contemplate in his heart Christ dying upon the cross. That is why the Lord said of old: The fire on the altar is to be kept burning; it must not go out. Every morning the priest shall put firewood on it (Lev. 6:5) Listen Mother devout: your heart is the altar of God. It is here that the fire of intense love must burn always. You are to feed it every day with the wood of the cross of Christ and the commemoration of His passion. The prophet Isaiah says, You shall draw waters with joy out of the Savior's fountains (Isa 12:3); meaning that whoever wishes to obtain from God the waters of grace, the waters of devotion, the waters of tears, must draw from the fountains which are the five wounds of Christ.

 

"Therefore let your love lead your steps to Jesus wounded, to Jesus crowned with thorns, to Jesus fastened upon the gibbet of the cross. Not only see in His hands the print of the nails, with the apostle Thomas, not only put your finger into the place of the nails, not only put your hand into His side, but enter with your whole being through the door of his side into Jesus' heart itself. There transformed into Christ by your burning love for the Crucified, pierced by the nails of the fear of God, wounded by the spear of super-abounding love, transfixed by the sword of intimate compassion, seek nothing, desire nothing, wish for no consolation, other than to be able to die with Christ on the cross. Then you may cry out with the apostle Paul: With Christ, I am nailed to the cross. It is now no longer I that live, but Christ lives in me (Gal. 19-20)."

 

Saint Bonaventure 

On the Perfection of Life Addressed to the Sisters, The Works of Bonaventure

Confession

This is Beauty, You O Lord, have ravished my heart

+JMJ+

Tonight as I was praying in the Chapel with Jesus in the tabernacle, beauty is what was on my heart, only it felt heavy, thinking of how beauty is distorted and ignored and discarded and degraded in our world right now.  I had just read Marc Barnes' post, Dappled Things My Dear Readers.  True Beauty elevates our hearts and minds to God and His Glory.

In my facebook newsfeed this afternoon, one right after another was first a picture posted by Endow on the Dignity of Women and Feminine Genius and then another picture from a feminist group whose name I do not even want to type here, shared by a friend.  The contrast was so startling that it jarred me into realizing how the beauty of feminine dignity is so much under attack, even by those who profess to be all about giving voice to women.  It makes me so sad for my sisters that do not know their true dignity as beloved daughters of God.  Another quote that that was on my newsfeed was from Dignitas Magazine:

"True beauty emanates from a woman who boldly and unabashedly knows who she is in Christ."~Jen Smidt

True beauty is shown in these women making their Final Profession of Vows with the Carmelite Sisters of the Most Sacred Heart of Los Angeles.  They sing, "The joy I feel in my soul comes from knowing You."  That is Beauty.

But, I am human, and my heart became heavy once again thinking of how, I, myself, do not feel beautiful.  Right there in quiet, peace, and tranquility, I forgot myself the dignity I have as a daughter of God.  So I began focusing on myself, rather than Christ and the beauty emanating from women who boldly and unabashedly know who they are in Christ. 

I feel spiritually beat up, bruised, tired, worn out, and just plain not beautiful.  It has been a difficult week, and I am probably too hard on myself, but really, being a wife and mother is hard work, and just plain messy.  This is especially true with young children that all have minds of their own along with a mom who is trying to figure it all out herself and often forgets who she is in Christ.  My heart has a long way to go to find healing and I just found myself thinking how can I ever be beautiful, how can spiritually beat up, bruised, tired, worn out ever be beautiful?  I feel more like a worn out wife, and definitely not a bride.  How could that be beautiful?

And then something miraculous happened.  I looked up from the tabernacle to the Crucifix, and then I realized that beat up, bruised, tired, and worn out is Beautiful, but only on the Cross.  I often contemplate the Cross when I come to pray, but I think that there must be some new lighting on the Cross in our Chapel.  It seemed brighter, and even the shadow cast by Christ hanging on the Cross, pouring out His life for me was beautiful.  Beautiful beyond words.  And He poured Himself out like that, took on the ugliness and harshness of the Cross, out of Love for me, to reconcile me to Our Father.  That is true Beauty.

From a poem I wrote a few years ago:

We weep here at His Cross, we cry out in anguish.
He has overcome all by His Love and Mercy.
This is Beauty, You O Lord, have ravished my heart
by Your Love and Mercy. Your Cross has set me free.

Amen.

"Fasting detaches you from this world, prayer reattaches you to the next world"

I trust in You Jesus. 

We have been given an amazing opportunity to witness to the hope that we have been given in Jesus Christ. Our hope is in Him, not in men, not in princes.  He gives Himself completely to us in the Sacraments, and thanks be to God, we still can receive Him without fear in our country.  Hope in Jesus Christ is our anchor and He will not abandon us during this current storm, even if things get decidedly worse.  It is going to take a lot of trust on our part, and He will give us fortitude and courage to speak when we need to, take action when called for, and to stand firm in silence when necessary.

Each one of us has been born at this time for a particular reason.  In our ordinary lives, we are called to love in an extraordinary way.  There is a lot going on in our world and country, and it is very discouraging at times.  But God has not abandoned us.  We may be chastised a bit, but we trust in His Love for us and in His Divine Providence.  He gives and He takes away.  In all, is His Grace.  In this time, I can choose to become overwhelmed with the things of the world or I can choose to place all my trust in Him.  Trusting in Him does not mean complacency or ignoring what is going on around me.  There is a battle going on, and we must remain engaged.  Trusting in Him means giving myself completely to Him in relationship as His beloved daughter and knowing He will call me to action where I am needed in the battle.  The only way to remain grounded in Him right now is through prayer and fasting.  As Archbishop Fulton Sheen once said,

"Fasting detaches you from this world, prayer reattaches you to the next world."  

It takes discernment to hear what God is telling us, and with too much indulgence (non only food, but information and material goods) comes fog, but with fasting comes clarity.  May we discern where God wants us to be in this battle, equipped with all the virtues, especially the theological and cardinal:  faith, hope, love, prudence, justice, fortitude, and temperance.

Lord, have mercy on us as we place our trust in You.  Mary, our Mother, watch over us.  I give you my will, conform it to the will of Your Son.  Most Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on us.  Immaculate Heart of Mary, pray for us.  St. Joseph, pray for us.  Most Sacred Heart of Jesus, have mercy on us.  In Your Most Holy Name, Amen.

Right from the Heart of God

Recently, I was visiting my grandfather in the hospital.  He has been very sick, so I would also ask for your prayers for him.  He is on the road to recovery, but a difficult recovery at 83 years old.  It was a last minute trip down to Texas to help my grandma while grandpa was in the hospital.  He took a turn for the worst the day Michael (our baby) and I arrived in Texas.  Originally, I had planned to come and help out in between times when my dad and aunts and uncles would be there, but when things took a turn for the worst, everyone came back, including many cousins I had not seen in many years, to be with grandpa.  Although this reunion was not under the best of circumstances, it was so good to see everyone again and to be a part of something bigger than my own day to day world. 

Grandma and I spent a lot of time together, and it was so good to be able to just be with her.  I was blessed to be the one to bring her to the hospital every day and take her home again at night.  Please keep her in prayer too as all of this has taken its toll on her health as well.  My grandparents have been like second parents to me.  I lived with them my last three years of high school, and they have always been there for me.  It is such a blessing to have a close relationship with my grandma and grandpa and extended family.  During all the ups and downs of life, which I touched on in my last post, my extended family, and especially my grandparents have been a true gift from God.  He has loved me through their fidelity and care for their family.  Grandma and  Grandpa came when our first two children were born, and Grandma loved me by making sure I got enough rest and did not have to cook one single item (she is the best cook in the world!!!!), and Grandpa made sure I had enough hugs, and when our 2nd was born, read the same books over and over and over to our daughter.  As their health has started to decline, they haven't been able to come make the visit up here any more, but we still love to go home to visit them.  To me, my childhood home is wherever they are.  When I lived with them, they were in Tennessee, but now they are back in Texas, which is where I was born.

During that time, it was so moving to see Grandma sitting by my Grandpa's side holding his hand and caring for him.  They will be married 64 years this month.  It was a gift to witness this after going to the women's conference the weekend before and hearing Father talk about the desire of children to be caught up in the love that created them in the first place, ultimately God's Love.  Watching and being a part of Grandma sitting by Grandpa's side in the hospital was a true gift from God, filling the hole in my heart.  The moment I saw them together, I knew that their love and faithfulness to each other comes right from the Heart of God and reaches out into the darkness of the world, bringing light and hope where it is desperately needed.  As we all have experienced in our own lives, Grandma and Grandpa have had their ups and downs in their married life, but through it all have remained faithful to their vows.  This is what a true sacramental marriage is, a husband and wife coming together and remaining together in the Love of God.  The children that come from their marriage are a both a natural and supernatural manifestation of the love that brings them together, eternal souls created to be light and love in the world.

After being away from the Church for a very long time, Grandpa came back into the Catholic Church about 15 years ago, and Grandma with him.  This was about the same time I converted to Catholicism.  God is good.  As grandpa was in the ICU and not really responsive, I held his hand with his rosary beads intertwined and prayed with him.  He moved his fingers over the beads while we prayed, just the way he does when he prays the rosary, which he had done every day since his return to the Church.  With grandma, we prayed the Divine Mercy Chaplet too.  Even though he had not been responding by talking, I stroked his hair and whispered in his ear, "I love you"  and he said back, "I love you too."  These were the first words he had spoken in days.  My aunt and I looked at eachother in shock and joy, and she also told him she loved him and he told her back that he loved her too.  When I had to say good bye to Grandpa several days later, I whispered to him again, "I love you."  He moved his mouth and tried so hard to get the words out, and finally, whispered, with much effort, "I love you." 

I did not know if it would be the last time to see him here on this earth, but he is now responding and was just moved to a rehabilitation center in the last few days.  Please pray for him, for my grandma, and for all of our family.  Pray for our family that God's love will penetrate our hearts, heal the hurts and sustain us all.



 

Agony

From the comments on a blog post to which I would rather not link, author unknown:

Agony

In a garden
On a warm spring night
Long ago,
The Lord of All, conjoined
With frail humanity
Saw
Down the ages
An angry, spiteful, hating
Man.
And looking beyond
(the insult to his body)
Saw
A soul in torment
And wept tears of blood.

(Kyrie eleison, Christe eleison, Kyrie eleison)

Refreshment for Our Souls

One of the many things I love about our Catholic faith is the beauty of the liturgical year and various liturgical seasons and special monthly devotions providing a prayerful rhythm for our daily lives. November is a month we especially remember our beloved dead. This past week was the first time I had ever offered special prayers during the first week of November for our beloved souls in purgatory. Our Lord revealed to St. Gertrude:

"I accept with highest pleasure what is offered to Me for the poor souls, for I long inexpressibly to have near Me those for whom I paid so great a price. By the prayers of thy loving soul, I am induced to free a prisoner from purgatory as often as thou dost move thy tongue to utter a word of prayer!"

Four centuries before devotion of Our Lord's Most Sacred Heart was given to the world, Our Lord revealed to St. Gertrude His adorable Heart,

"at one time as a treasury in which all riches are contained; at another time as a harp which is played upon by the Holy Spirit, the sweetness of whose tones ravished the Blessed Trinity and all the heavenly court. Once it was represented to her as a fountain, the delicious and plentiful waters of which refresh the souls in purgatory, strengthen and enrich the just on earth, and fill the blessed in heaven with inebriating delights."

I love the way He revealed His Sacred Heart to St. Gertrude, with the imagery of the fountain providing for the Church Suffering, Church Militant, and Church Triumphant. We are all one Body and what a beautiful gift we have to offer prayers through Christ for one another. It was a blessing to be able to pray with you, and with Our Lady, in a special way last week for indulgences for our beloved souls.


UPDATE: Remember Me is a beautiful remembrance book available for purchase here. Here is a description from the website:

Remember Me is a family heirloom that is sure to be used again and again. It serves as a constant reminder to pray for loved ones who have gone before you. It is our hope that Remember Me will become a focal point of prayer for you and your family each and every month. As you use it, you will be filled with comfort and special memories — so that the souls of our faithful departed will live on and never be forgotten.

Coming Together with the Heart of the Church

Recently, news of Archbishop Patrick Zurek asking Fr. Frank Pavone to cease public ministry outside of the diocese of Amarillo due to financial concerns has been in the pro life and Catholic blogosphere. This post is not about Fr. Frank Pavone, but his situation is what finally gave me the courage to write it.

In speaking of this with a friend, she made a point about what happens to the priests who aren't well known who become accused?

We must not abandon our Spiritual Fathers. Yes, I do believe we must pray, always we must pray, and fast for our priests. But to put love into action requires a bit more. When a priest is accused, first, he deserves the presumption of innocence until a full investigation takes place. In this presumption of innocence, he deserves the public support of his diocese, and the Church at large. I do not mean blind support, but support with the Heart of the Church, with Mercy and Love as our foundation, always taking into account the great hurt that may have been committed against the victim.

We have recourse to our Mother Mary, who will not abandon us or any of her children who flee to her for protection. If guilt is found, we must follow Mary as our guide and still must not abandon our Spiritual Fathers. We all desperately need the Mercy of Christ. Forgiveness is a necessity for healing, even for, especially for, the victim. Justice cannot be served without repentance and forgiveness. Believe me, this is something that I have lived and know.

This past Sunday, we heard about forgiveness in the Gospel. We cannot control the response of other people, but we can our own. It is my prayer that we will come together and support our priests in a public way, with the presumption of innocence to begin, and with mercy and forgiveness always, both for the priest and the accuser. If we come together in loving support and become stronger when this happens, maybe, just maybe, some of the nonsensical false accusations will cease. If not, then those who make false accusations are only accomplishing what they mean to do and that is to tear us apart. Our mercy must also extend to those who are making false accusations; however, mercy does not mean standing by and letting a great wrong persist just to keep from offending people who are hurting. It does no good to real victims of crimes to let a false accusation stand.

For more information about falsely accused priests, visit Fr. Gordon MacRae's blog These Stone Walls. He had a wonderful post a few months ago, If Night Befalls Your Father, You Don't Discard Him. You Just Don't!

Also at Fr. MacRae's blog is commentary, including an article about priests who have been found guilty and who have been "discarded." Let us not abandon our priests ever. This does not mean condoning or accepting horrible crimes. This means living with the reality of Christ's call to repentance in our own lives, and to forgive as we have been forgiven. God's mercy is greater than all of this.

St. John Vianney, pray for us! St. Joseph, terror of demons, pray for us! St. Michael the Archangel, defend us in battle! Our Lady of Good Help, pray for us! Christ, have Mercy on us!

UPDATE: Read Fr. MacRae's latest post: SNAP Judgements Part II: Ground Zero of the Catholic Scandal.

Beauty Remains

Last night we watched Of Gods and Men. What a beautiful and profound movie. Steven Greydanus does an excellent job of reviewing this movie at Decent Films. The meaning of this movie will linger in my mind and heart for a long time. During one poignant scene, Christian says the following:

"Should it ever befall me, and it could happen today, to be a victim of the
terrorism swallowing up all foreigners here, I would like my community, my
church, my family, to remember that my life was given to God and to his
country. That the Unique Master of all life was no stranger to this brutal
departure. And that my death is the same as so many other violent ones,
consigned to the apathy of oblivion. I've lived enough to know, I am
complicit in the evil that, alas, prevails over the world and the evil that
will smite me blindly. I could never desire such a death. I could never feel
gladdened that these people I love be accused randomly of my murder."

There is so much violence, unrest, persecution, starvation and yes, apathy in the world. Yet Beauty remains, ever ancient ever new. May God give us courage and strength to remain in His Love amidst the deathly blows of the violence and indifference of the world and in our own hearts. Love calls us to respond to the needs of our fellow human beings crying out in anguish across the globe.

NOTE: After sleeping on it, I changed the title of this post from "Consigned to the Apathy of Oblivion" to Beauty Remains. Why? Because Beauty does remain. When we abide in His Love, we are not consigned to the apathy of oblivion, regardless of the suffering we may endure or observe. He is always with us. I'm a glass full kind of gal. Really.

He is always with us, we just need to believe it and trust Him.

He Knows What He is About

I have not posted on politics in awhile, mainly because I haven't been following it much, but I read something Ed Morissey said this morning that makes a lot of sense regarding the fiscal mess our country is in:

There is a lot of anger at the moment in the US over the embarrassment of the downgrade, as well as shock. I’m most amused by the shock, to tell the truth. S&P didn’t say anything yesterday that was not common knowledge and common sense. If you had to rate a potential investment that had an income of, say, $22,000 a year but had costs of $37,000 per year, a standing debt of $143,000, and contracted future debt that exceeded $1 million, would you give that investment a gold-plated AAA rating and buy their bonds at the lowest interest rate possible, or at all? Of course not, but that’s exactly the fiscal situation of the US, at a 100,000,000:1 scale.

The anger is mainly misdirected. The media wants to blame the Tea Party, but the Tea Party wants to solve the actual problem — overspending and overcommitment to entitlement programs. The Tea Party wants to blame the Obama administration, and it deserves some blame for refusing to address the real structural problems of the US fiscal condition. But that fiscal structure far predates Barack Obama, both as President and as human being, and Congresses and White Houses of both parties have done little to address the real problems in Medicare, Medicaid, and Social Security.

Why? Because as soon as people try to do so, demagogues accuse them of wanting to push Grandma over a cliff. Voters respond by punishing the reformers and rewarding the demagogues. If we collectively want to blame someone, we collectively should be looking in a mirror.

So where do we go from here? I do not know, I'm just a woman trying to be a loving wife, mother, and friend, knowing that I am a daughter of God. We try as a family to be responsible with our finances and to give our first fruits to God. While I do not know the solution (besides more responsibility in our own lives as well as that of our government), I do know that the only true answer is to trust God and follow His ways, He knows what He is about.

Love is Here

Tenth Avenue North:



And they're good in concert too!

Moving from Sorrow into Joy through His Divine Mercy

There is a difficulty in moving from the penance of Lent and sorrow of Holy Week into the joy of Easter and our Lord's Resurrection. Our Holy Church provides such a blessing as we celebrate Easter Day as one continuous day during the Easter Octave. This year, it is giving me time to move my devotion for the Cross of Christ into the joy of His Resurrected Life. I am not making promises about getting there though within this week..... maybe by Pentecost?

This particular Easter I find that life is particularly messy and it has been a real struggle moving from the sorrow (and joy) of the cross to the pure joy of the resurrection. We are now within weeks (if not days) of delivering our new baby! As exciting as this may be, it also carries with it a lot of burden. As much as I am trying to focus on the joy that cometh, in reality, I also am having a hard time with mixed emotions of the pregnancy ending and wanting this pregnancy to be done!! New life is such a beautiful gift and I am so grateful for God's gift to us and to me to be able to carry His creation within, but I am also so tired and ready to be able to move a bit more normally again (God willing).

I also have some fear about labor and delivery, and trusting in God's Mercy is really the only way to get through this time. I am so thankful for the prayers of the Divine Mercy novena, carrying through from Good Friday and through the Easter Octave. I keep trying to think about that moment just after our other babies were born, where words are hard to describe the joy at holding and seeing God's creation for our family for the first time. That is the joy that cometh, new life, and the beauty of God's Love shown in one little soul. A small foretaste of the Joy of being in His Presence forever, perhaps?

Eternal God, in whom Mercy is endless, and the treasury of compassion inexhaustible, look kindly upon us, and increase Your Mercy in us, that in difficult moments, we might not despair, nor become despondent, but with great confidence, submit ourselves to Your Holy Will, which is Love and Mercy Itself.

I turned 40 on Monday, and my husband and children will tell you that I have not been very pleasant to live with for the past several weeks (maybe even longer??, oh, we won't go there). I'll say it again, life is just messy, and even more so when I begin to contemplate the labor pangs going on in the world right now as well. Trusting in the Mercy of Our Lord Jesus Christ and in His Resurrection is the only way to make it out of this present darkness.

In my own heart, the darkness threatens daily, and I must look up, away from myself, and to His Resurrection and His Mercy to know His Love and Strength. It is so hard not to be consumed by the information around us and by our own daily anxieties, but Hope in Him is our anchor. He brings us joy now, here in this world He has created for us. Even though there are trials and struggles He has bled and died to give us new life in Him. Let us turn our hearts to the joy that cometh and to the joy that He gives now.

+JMJ+

Hide me within Your wounds, Lord Jesus. Let me never forget Your Sacrifice, but allow me to know Your Joy and Your Resurrection too. Pour forth your Divine Mercy, in the water and blood gushing forth from Your Heart, into my body and soul, so that I may truly know Your Resurrected Life within. Lord, I open myself completely to You. In Your Divine Mercy, cast out my fear. I trust in You. I trust in You. I trust in You! In Your Holy Name, Amen.