Serving from the Strength of Christ

Several years ago, I read the book Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World by Joanna Weaver. It was a wonderful book that I studied with a group of moms. During our discussion, some of us related more to Martha, some more to Mary, and some to both, depending on the place we were at in our lives.

I confess that at times I can relate to neither Martha nor Mary, as I have an awful tendency to be both lazy and not prayerful at the same time, just sort of sitting around focusing inward rather than upward toward God. This is a constant battle and it is good to know that God never takes His eye off of me, even if I wander away from Him.

One of the best things from the book was a discussion of the 3 Deadly D's:

Distraction, Discouragement, and Doubt

We can end up on a path of downward spiral simply by becoming distracted, and we all know this is so easy to do in the information/entertainment age in which we live. Once we hit discouragement, which may be where Martha was when she complained about Mary not helping her, it is not far until we are clouded with doubt that can pull us into despair (a D all it's own) if we are not vigilant. It takes a recollected, prayerful heart to keep from being pulled into this downward spiral. When we are recollected in the Love of God, then we can serve from the strength of Christ, rather than our own inevitable weakness.

Another very clarifying element of the book for me was Joanna's discussion of concern versus worry and her battle against fear. Joanna tells us, "Concern draws us to God. Worry pulls us from him."

Concern	Worry
Involves a legitimate threat	Is often unfounded
Is specific (one thing)	Is generalized (spreads to many things)
Addresses the problem	Obsesses about the problem
Solves problems	Creates more problems
Looks to God for answer	Looks to self or other people for answers

So, if we find ourselves anxiety ridden, fearful, or insecure, we must give our anxieties, fears and worries to God, and He will give us peace. We need only trust in Him and His love and care for us and our needs.

Here are some helpful strategies for fighting discouragement that Joanna gives us in her book
Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World:

We all dip down now and then into discouragement. The secret is not to stay there. Here are several ways you can beat the downward spiral of the Deadly Ds in your life.

• Allow for rest stops. Discouragement is often our body’s way of saying, “Stop! I need rest.” Try taking a nap or getting to bed a little earlier It’s amazing how different things will look in the light of morning (Exodus 34:21).
• Get a new point of view. Take a few steps back and ask God to help you see his perspective on your situation. Often what seems to be an impassable mountain in our eyes is only a steppingstone in His (Isaiah 33:17).
• Have patience. It’s easy to get discouraged when things don’t go the way you planned. But if you’ve committed your concerns to the Lord, you can be sure He is at work, even when you don’t see His hand (Romans 8:28).
• Mingle. Discouragement feeds off isolation. Get out of the house! Go visit some friends. It’s amazing how good, old-fashioned fellowship can lift our spirits and chase away the blues (Psalm 133:1).
• Set the timer. Okay. So things aren’t so good. I’ve found it helpful to set the oven timer and allow ten minutes for a good cry. But when the buzzer sounds, I blow my nose, wipe my eyes, and surrender my situation to the Lord so I can move on (Ecclesiastes 3:4).

The LORD himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.

Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.

Deuteronomy 31:8

St. Bernard of Clairvaux - On Loving God

Have been reading St. Bernard Clairvaux's On Loving God. What a wonderful book this has been, not very long, yet packed with so much goodness! It is one I will re-read again and again. Today at Mass, the gospel was taken from Matthew 13: 47-53 where Jesus uses parable to describe the kingdom of Heaven as a net thrown into the sea. Yesterday, I just read in the last chapter of On Loving God, St. Bernard's thoughts on the heavenly Fatherland. This is such a rewarding chapter that I decided to put the entire chapter here, but you will want to read the entire book:

On Loving God by St. Bernard Clairvaux

Chapter 15: Of the Four Degrees of Love, and of the Blessed State of the Heavenly Fatherland

Nevertheless, since we are carnal and are born of the lust of the flesh, it must be that our desire and our love shall have its beginning in the flesh.

But rightly guided by the grace of God through these degrees, it will have its consummation in the spirit: for that was not first which is spiritual but that which is natural; and afterward that which is spiritual (1 Corinthians 15:46). And we must bear the image earthly first, before we can bear the image of the heavenly. At first, man loves himself for his own sake.

That is the flesh, which can appreciate nothing beyond itself. Next, he perceives that he cannot exist by himself, and so begins by faith to seek after God, and to love Him as something necessary to his own welfare.

That is the second degree, to love God, not for God’s sake, but selfishly.

But when he has learned to worship God and to seek Him aright, meditating on God, reading God’s Word, praying and obeying His commandments, he comes gradually to know what God is, and finds Him altogether lovely. So, having tasted and seen how gracious the Lord is (Psalm 34:8), he advances to the third degree, when he loves God, not merely as his benefactor but as God. Surely he must remain long in this state; and I know not whether it would be possible to make further progress in this life to that fourth degree and perfect condition wherein man loves himself solely for God’s sake. Let any who have attained so far bear record; I confess it seems beyond my powers. Doubtless it will be reached when the good and faithful servant shall have entered into the joy of his Lord (Matthew 25:21), and been satisfied with the plenteousness of God’s house (Psalm 36:8). For then in wondrous wise he will forget himself as if delivered from self, he will grow wholly God’s. Joined unto the Lord, he will then be one spirit with Him (1 Corinthians 6:17). This was what the prophet meant, I think, when he said: “I will go for the in the strength of the Lord God: and will make mention of Thy righteousness only” (Psalm 71:16).

Surely he knew that when he should go forth in the spiritual strength of the Lord, he would have been freed from the infirmities of the flesh, and would have nothing carnal to think of, but would be wholly filled in his spirit with the righteousness of the Lord.

In that day the members of Christ can say of themselves what St. Paul testified concerning their Head: “Yea, though we have known Christ after the flesh, yet now henceforth know we Him no more” (2 Corinthians 5:16).

None shall thereafter know himself after the flesh; for “flesh and blood cannot inherit the Kingdom of God” (1 Corinthians 15:50). Not that there will be no true substance of the flesh, but all carnal needs will be taken away, and the love of the flesh will be swallowed up in the love of the spirit, so that our weak human affections will be made divinely strong.

Then the net of charity which as it is drawn through the great and wide sea doth not cease to gather every kind of fish, will be drawn to the shore; and the bad will be cast away, while only the good will be kept (Matthew 13:48). In this life the net of all-including love gathers every kind of fish into its wide folds, becoming all things to all men, sharing adversity or prosperity, rejoicing with them that do rejoice, and weeping with them that weep (Romans 12:15). But when the net is drawn to shore, whatever causes pain will be rejected, like the bad fish, while only what is pleasant and joyous will be kept. Do you not recall how St. Paul said: “Who is weak and I am not weak? Who is offended and I burn not?” And yet weakness and offense were far from him. So too he bewailed many which had sinned already and had not repented, though he was neither the sinner nor the penitent. But there is a city made glad by the rivers of the flood of grace (Psalm 46:4), and whose gates the Lord loveth more than all the dwellings of Jacob (Psalm 87:2). In it is not place for lamentation over those condemned to everlasting fire, prepared for the devil and his angels (Matthew 25:41). In these earthly dwellings, though men may rejoice, yet they have still other battles to fight, other mortal perils to undergo. But in the heavenly Fatherland, no sorrow nor sadness can enter: as it is written, “The habitation of all rejoicing ones is in Thee” (Psalm 87:7); and again, “Everlasting joy shall be unto them” (Isaiah 61:7). Nor could they recall things piteous, for then they will make mention of God’s righteousness only. Accordingly, there will be no need for the exercise of compassion, for no misery will be there to inspire pity.

A Story of Hope

This morning I read a great post over at Creative Minority Report about one couple's struggle with conceiving and their decision to go to Gianna Catholic Healthcare Center for Women. The writer Mary talks about how when you prepare for marriage the priest asks you if you are open to having children, but what about the burden of not being able to get pregnant? She does not talk about miscarriage, but the loss of a child by miscarriage and multiple miscarriages is devastating as well. Here is an excerpt, you will want to read the whole post over at CMR:

But they never ask if you are you prepared for when the children don't come. It can be a frustrating and devastating process full of anxiety, doubt, and heartbreak. It is also not something you fail at once like your 7th grade Social Studies test, it's something that 12 times a year you know you failed. After a year or maybe two, you start to really wonder if something is wrong with you. You see your friends having babies and they tell you you’re next. Or you see a show on television where the character is having a baby and you have to switch channels. Or because you look at the second bedroom in your place that you named the nursery when you moved in and now call the office.

I went through five years of this. So many tears and advice. Of course, IVF was not an option. Where do you turn? On my birthday last year, I got the monthly reminder that we failed. Again. As I laid on my bed crying, my husband decided to make a call. He called Gianna, The Catholic Healthcare Center for Women. My brother Matthew had told us about them.....

Read the rest here.

St. Gianna, pray for us!

A Pearl of Great Price - Pay it Forward Tuesday

Pay it Forward is hosted by Holly at A Life-Size Catholic Blog. Thanks Holly!

One of my favorite priest bloggers (or rather, a priest who happens to blog), Fr. Andrew, has a great post from his homily this past Sunday at his website Catholic-Vision in which he challenges us to live the wisdom of Scripture:

The wisdom of Scripture says to sell everything for the sake of the Kingdom of Heaven. Like a great pearl there is no price too great. Like treasure in the field we must sell all to acquire that field. The wisdom of the world says to hold something back for yourselves and don’t trust the Kingdom of Heaven to provide for you—which is the wisdom of our enemy, the master of this world, Satan.

He reminds us of the 43rd Anniversary of Humanae Vitae and the consequences of choices our culture has made regarding the use of artificial contraception. His post is not about what is right and what is wrong, but about our trust in God. Fr. Andrew speaks to us with love and with challenge, as a good father does. Thanks Fr. Andrew! Read his post here.

A Noble Purpose

What a wonderful and joyous occasion to witness the beginning of a sacramental marriage! While on vacation, we went to a cousin's wedding at St. Patrick Cathedral in Ft. Worth, Texas. It was a true blessing to witness the bride and groom offer their sacramental vows to one another in such a holy and beautiful cathedral. Everything about their wedding drew my heart to worshiping God through His Son, our Lord, in the Eucharist. It was such a joy to be in the presence of Christ in such a beautiful and holy place.

As the father of the bride offered his daughter to be given in marriage, I could sense the presence of the bride's mother who had died nearly five years ago due to early onset Alzheimer's disease. The bride's mother, my husband's aunt, was a devout Catholic woman who dedicated her life to her Lord and to her family. The bride's mother and my husband's mother are the oldest two girls of thirteen children. They grew up in a small village in Wisconsin with several houses, a bar, and a beautiful old Catholic Church! Oh, how wonderful to grow up so close to Jesus in the tabernacle.

The Old Testament reading was from the book of Tobit. In Tobit is the beautiful account of the Archangel St. Raphael sent to aid in the healing of Tobit's blindness and to heal Sarah's grief on losing seven husbands, each dying before consummation of their marriage. Unbeknownst to each other, both Tobit and Sarah had cried out in anguish to God at the same time, and in God's great Mercy He answered their prayers of grief and sorrow with blessing.

In the prayers of Tobit and Sarah, they praised God and cried out with faith in His Mercy despite being deeply grieved in spirit. The Archangel St. Raphael led Tobiah, Tobit's son, to Sarah and they became husband and wife. Then they returned to Tobit and God healed his blindness.

Before consummating their marriage, Tobiah and Sarah prayed together, begging for God's mercy and deliverance. I have always loved this prayer since the first time I heard it. What a humble and wise way to begin a marriage:

Blessed are you, O God of our fathers,
praised be your name forever and ever.
Let the heavens and all your creation
praise you forever.
You made Adam and You gave him his
wife Eve
to be his help and support;
and from these two the human race
descended.
You said, 'It is not good for the man to be alone;
let us make him a partner like himself.'
Now, Lord, you know that I take this wife of mine
not because of lust,
but for a noble purpose.
Call down your mercy on me and on her,
and allow us to live together to a
happy old age.

They said together, "Amen, amen," and
went to bed for the night.

~Tobit 8:5-8

Last year, a friend gave me a book about St. Raphael by Angela Carol. In the book, it is mentioned that St. Raphael is, among other things, the patron of happy and holy marriages. May St. Raphael guide us along in our journey, encourage us in our faith and in our marriage, and aid us in opening our hearts to God's healing power. St. Raphael, pray for us!

In His Presence

Back to the Rule

Thank you for your prayers. Last night I went to spend time with my Lord in Adoration, and I stayed for longer than I had planned. It was so wonderful to spend time in His presence. I started by praying for Jesus to remain with me using St. Pio's prayer Stay With Me and listened to His words as he taught me how to adore Him with Remain Close to Me, a prayer posted by Fr. Mark at Vultus Christi. Fr. Mark has a wonderful post today, Live in us as Thou livest in the Sacred Host. Here is a part of what Fr. Mark says, although you will want to read the entire post:

Far from being a baroque adornment detracting from some mythical primitive Benedictine sobriety, Eucharistic adoration is the wellspring of the holiness that Saint Benedict describes in his Rule.

Eucharistic Adoration is the school of hiddenness,
-- of silence,
-- of solitude,
-- of humility,
-- of obedience,
-- of servanthood,
-- of an abiding love that calls no attention to itself,
-- of ceaseless prayer to the Father,
-- of the Work of God,
-- of compassion for sinners,
-- of burning love for souls,
-- of gentleness towards the weak,
-- of Divine Hospitality,
-- of monastic perfection.

This morning I awoke and rather than go right to breakfast, feeding Michael, getting on the computer, etc.... I said morning prayer for the first time in months! Pray for me as I get back to a Mother's rule of life. It will take some time to figure out our new normal with the blessing of Michael among us, but I can begin again with the prayer part of our rule. It is amazing how we neglect that which we need most in times of change in our lives. Pray for us to get back to the basics of our prayer life and to not abandon it so easily next time life gets crazy, which will probably be today or tomorrow around here ;)

To remain consistent in prayer, this I believe will help me to learn how to live as a daughter of God. And then, living as a daughter loved and taught by God, I will be able to be a better wife and mother and serve Him with my whole heart as I live out my vocation.

Thank You Lord for this privilege and grace! And thank You Lord for loving me as your daughter even when I fall. Mary, I give you my will, conform it to the will of your Son. Father, I pray through Your Son, Our Lord Jesus Christ, Amen.